Somedays I feel I'm not gonna make it. Today is one of those days 😢
Why should I ?
Maybe my music ain't that great. Yeah, I make music, but so does millions of struggling musicians.
Most are better looking, they sing, they play gigs, and they're in the heart of the action. Who am I kidding? I'm hoping for a miracle 😳
My writing is stupid. How many people out there share their lives and they're a thousand times better than I at expressing themselves. Bollocks 😂
I'm just trying to be reasonable here. I'm not thinking about myself. Actually, even if I was alone, I'd still be frightened. There is no income. I'm not thinking about now, I'm thinking 5-10 years from now. My kids are growing, and what I thought to be a transitional period is lasting 😱

My father in-law had an accident two days ago. We had to rush him to the Emergency in the morning because his nose started bleeding at 4 am and didn't stop till the doctor put a gauge in it.
Alya, my youngest daughter is becoming a problem. She'll be four this month. She's too defiant and most of our confrontations end up in her crying and me feeling bad for being so harsh and raising my voice. She was crying in the car all the way to the nursery today.
Things at work are not going that well, either. Today, it felt like a big boulder was on my chest just entering the office. That's a long story for another time.
I played real bad at football today. I got the TV back, thank God, but I had to pay 2000 LE...and every penny these days counts. The producer postponed our meeting till Saturday, fingers crossed. I ordered three sandwiches from a restaurant on my way back home. When I opened the bags to start eating, there was only two sandwiches 😭
Today was a great day.

Some people have accidents, some people die, some people starve and some people can't see. I'm blessed.

The only thing that's bothering me is the future. I'm thinking if I can't make it with this song, its wiser to shut it down. This song is done. There is no turning back on this one. I also need to spend a  substantial amount of money on marketing because I can't call it quits before I do that.

I'm thinking my friend decided to fund me some money, I shouldn't waste it all on the dream and then realize I'm at zero again 😱 I should save the rest of the money and use it on something less risky. Do something safe like Real Estate.

Writing these words is so frustrating and this kind of pessimism is boring and uninspiring, but it's just one of those days.

Yeah....I saw Kong: Skull Island today, right after I got the TV. Not a bad movie. I hoped it would be better though. It felt like a staged film. The environment served the story. I'm imagining the filmmakers going "You know what would be cool, if this island had a huge spider"..nothing felt connected. It was cool for visuals but didn't make sense.
I remember reading about Kong when it was announced, just after I returned from Qatar. The movie got made and I saw it, and I didn't take one step forward since its announcement. Now that's depressing....


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